Roar! Tig on movies, music, motherhood and the mad world…

September 30, 2008

Tina Fey / Amy Poehler and Diva Moments

Filed under: Women's Issues, politics — Tags: , , , , — tigresden @ 12:37 pm

SNL’s Tina Fey and Amy Poehler struck gold again with such a hilariously on-target send up of VP nom Sarah Palin, I’m still laughing. I can understand why NBC is keeping these openings to SNL so close to home – YT users are having a terrible time trying to keep it out in the public domain — these scenes are PRICELESS and will go down in the annals of great political comedy. You can still watch it on NBC.com if you click below!

http://www.nbc.com/Saturday_Night_Live/video/clips/couric-palin-open/704042

For those of you who didn’t see the actual interview with Katie Couric, take a look here.  This is the entire interview with Katie and ranges from her thoughts on foreign policy to the economy.  Watch the original and then watch Tina and Amy’s send-off.  I would say that Palin’s real deal is funnier…if it weren’t so gosh darn scary!!!!

What just kills me is that after being skewered for her utter BOMB in this interview with Katie Couric, who by the way did a yeoman’s job in keep a straight face, the McCain-Palin campaign geniuses decided that Gov. Palin should go back and for a DO-OVER!   Only this time, Sarah didn’t go in alone.  Big John went and sat with her and basically made her look like a moron and made him look like an over-protective father figure.

Palin fans:  Do ya’ get the message.  Three highly respected conservative political analysts – George Will, David Brooks, and Kathleen Parker- are over you.  Parker writes in her article, “She’s Out of Her League,”

If BS were currency, Palin could bail out Wall Street herself.

If Palin were a man, we’d all be guffawing, just as we do every time Joe Biden tickles the back of his throat with his toes. But because she’s a woman — and the first ever on a Republican presidential ticket — we are reluctant to say what is painfully true.

What to do?

Only Palin can save McCain, her party, and the country she loves. She can bow out for personal reasons, perhaps because she wants to spend more time with her newborn. No one would criticize a mother who puts her family first.

Do it for your country.

Holy Toledo! And Cleveland, and Detroit, and Colorado Springs, and Montana, Wisconsin, and Missouri, swing states all! If that’s not a condemnation of Palin’s qualifications, I don’t know what is. I hope that all those independent voters out there are watching these interviews and listening closely to what this woman is saying. She will be the second most powerful person in this country if McCain gets elected. Think about that.

Please don’t be swayed by the fact that she’s a woman and, we as women, need to support a ticket that has a couple of double XX’s on it. We need to support women who are intelligent, knowledgeable of the issues, articulate in their communication, and know more about geography than saying that “we have foreign countries on either side of us.” I have no doubt that Sarah Palin loves her country and believes in the truth of her principles. I blame McCain and whoever is running his campaign for making a mistake of stupendous proportion which has resulted in the complete humiliation of this politician.

Of course, she could have said “No.” But can a beauty queen like Sarah Palin give up a Diva Moment like this one????? Apparently not.

September 26, 2008

Sarah sightings…

Filed under: politics — Tags: , , , , — tigresden @ 11:14 am

I have purposefully not followed the doings of the good Sarah much since Saturday Night Live. I was up to my neck in lipstick and had enough of the glasses and the beehive set. However, Judith Warner of the New York Times wrote a column every mom could relate to. We spend much of our parental lives trying to teach our kids empathy, sympathy, compassion. And boy, didn’t Judith hit that point, like every mother does, finding a place in her heart to be compassionate for Poor Sarah.

Me, I’m still not there, but I am trying. I missed the exclusive interview with Katie Couric. Didn’t know, didn’t care. But, upon reading Ms. Warner’s column, I felt compelled to re-visit Sarah and see if I couldn’t muster up some compassion. It was a 10 minute interview. Katie lobbed moonball questions at Sarah, about the economy, about her flirtations with Henry Kissinger and the other world leaders. Did you know that she met with the new Pakistani president? His comment about her was “I didn’t know she was so beautiful!!!” Great. Maybe if the other world leaders spend all their time drooling over her legs and tits, they won’t pay attention to the treaties we want them to sign. Maybe they’ll forgive our debts to their governments! Now that would be potent. Hmmmmm.

Or maybe she’ll open her mouth and the fantasy bubble will burst. I digress. I watched the Couric interview with some interest. It only confirmed my belief that Governor Palin is not qualified to represent the United States, and even less qualified to represent the image of women in general. She may continue to represent myopic, biblically literal, small-minded, gun-toting, moose-dressing, clueless mom-types in her church and in Wasilla.

In the meantime, take a look at this very funny video courtesy of comedienne Sara Beninsaca.

September 18, 2008

A little levity never hurt

Filed under: politics — Tags: , , , , , , , , — tigresden @ 8:47 pm

One of the reasons I love this election is because there’s so much opportunity for humor.  The last few election cycles really haven’t afforded our comic writers much opportunity to let loose.  It was no fun poking fun at the Prez anymore.   It was like harpooning fish in a bowl.  In addition, there weren’t a whole lot of really cool characters to work off of.   Then along came Sarah…

Thank you, Governor Palin, for doing a great impersonation of my favorite comedienne, Tina Fey…

And thanks, too for Amy Poehler’s performance as Senator Clinton.

September 16, 2008

Hamburgers and John McCain on the Economy

Filed under: politics — Tags: , , , , — tigresden @ 11:18 am

Senator McCain has once again made my head spin. Once, the bastian of principles in the Republican party, he has surprised me yet again with his complete supplication to the fear-driven, polarizing campaign strategies of the disciples of Karl Rove. Have they spiked they medication? Did they speak to him in tongues and hypnotized him out of his mind? Readers may mock my crazy theories about why he’s lost his way, but how else can you explain his complete collapse in message?

He continues to say the word R-E-F-O-R-M, but when it comes out of his mouth it sounds weak and disingenuous. It sounds truly weird.

Senator McCain, have you seen the ads they’ve produced for you sir? And then have you listened to yourself?? Perhaps not. So let’s take the latest example. The other day, you released an ad with an ominous tagline, “THE ECONOMY IN CRISIS…” and headlines about bank failures, foreclosures, and locusts (I’m kidding about the locusts). And yet that VERY SAME DAY, you were quoted as saying that “THE ECONOMIC FUNDAMENTALS ARE STRONG”….and then LATER you said that “THE ECONOMY IS AT RISK”

What is it Senator McCain????? What is is that you’re really trying to say to us?

I’m over Sarah Palin. Lehman Brothers is bankrupt and AIG needs insurance on itself. This is the “red meat” as all the political pundits like to call it. This is the heart of the matter — the economy. How are we going to feed our children? Send them to school? Take care of our parents? These are the important questions we want answered. 

In response, we’re getting Rove-an ads that portend disaster and spread fear about the future rather instilling confidence in the potential leaders. We’re getting mixed messages about what you think about the economy. 

We don’t know you anymore Senator McCain because you don’t know yourself anymore. You have lost yourself in the maelstrom of the Republican party machine. You have thrown in with the den of lions and they’ve ground your spirit up and spit it out on an All-American all-white bun. It looks like something good, but it’s tasteless and indistinguishable. No amount of lettuce, mayo, or ruby red-lipsticked “tomato” is going to change the fact that the meat of your message is ground up and re-hashed.

September 12, 2008

Hey Soccer Moms, Wear Your Own Color Lipstick

Filed under: Parenting, Women's Issues, politics — Tags: , , , , — tigresden @ 5:55 pm

 

I am a soccer mom and proud of it.  I enjoy volunteering at my children’s school and helping with the music program.  I love being a soccer referee for the Girls U-10 division. 

 

So, I resent whole-heartedly how soccer moms are being painted (or more appropriately, made- up) – that we are or should be Sarah Palin supporters.  If that’s how I’m being made-up, then I want a make-over. 

 

Give her the award for being the consummate multi-tasker.  Admire the beauty-queen looks and her diva stage presence.  But do NOT stand for the Palin-orama picture she projects as being reflective of YOUR soccer mommy-ness. 

 

I am reminded of something my grandma said to me one day after I was mocked by a classmate. “No one can judge a book by its cover.  When they know what’s inside of you, they will understand.”

 

I remember that now, as we’ve watched Palin’s meteoric rise on the national stage.  Governor Sarah Palin has a great book jacket. She is attractive and poised – no doubt due to the beauty pageant training. (For those who are apt to be offended by that reference, please don’t be.  I understand the nonsense that pageant contestants have to go through and they have my utmost respect.)   Palin is articulate and family-friendly, like a regular gal.  If you can get her resemblance to Tina Fey out of your head, you’re good to go.

 

But that’s a book jacket, ladies. The jacket text is intriguing! At the convention, they wrote her a great speech, which she delivered with confidence, control and great timing. 

 

But inside the front cover, the first few pages go like this….

 

Mayor Palin charges rape victims for forensic kits

I just read an AP story today that when Governor Palin was Mayor Palin of Wasilla, her administration charged rape victims – yes, I said rape victims – and their insurance companies for the cost of the “rape kits” that the police department used to gather forensic evidence to investigate the rape committed upon them.  The kits cost between $500 – $1200 each.   When it came to the attention of legislature at the state level, they passed a bill banning the practice. * (story courtesy of Associated Press)

 

 

Mayor Palin on banning books

After being elected Mayor of Wasilla, Palin called the librarian and asked how she could go about banning books.  News reports from local papers at the time show that “Palin threatened to fire the librarian for not giving ‘full support’ to the mayor.” *    Although no books were banned during her tenure, it worries me that someone in office would make a threat to fire a civil servant (a librarian for goo’ness-sake) for wanting to uphold something like, oh…the First Amendment.(http://www.time.com/time/politics/article/0,8599,1837918,00.html )

 

Palin, Politics, and Religion

Sarah Palin grew up in a Pentecostal church, and is a member of the Assembly of God in Wasilla.  Her views are fundamentalist.  Her interpretation of the Bible is literal — for those of us not in the media elite, that means word for word, no myth, no symbolism. Whatever’s there on paper is what God said.  So, doesn’t that mean that the cotton/wool blended suit she wears is a no-no in her BOOK?!?!?  And then, there’s Deuteronomy 21:18-21 -  the passage where parents are told to stone to death their disobedient children.  Hmmmm….  I wonder what will happen to Bristol now?   

 

But seriously ladies….I want my leaders to have values and morals and ethics.  I don’t really care if they’re any iteration of Christian, Jewish, Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist, or otherwise.  In a world riddled with fundamentalist vitriol and fanatical attacks, the President needs someone at his side who won’t let faith cloud reason, but have faith that reason will prevail.

 

In talking about Iraq, she has said “Our national leaders are sending them (our soldiers) out on a task that is from God…” and that “there is a plan, and that it is God’s plan…”  If another kind of fundamentalist was speaking these words, we’d be calling her a terrorist.  (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L4LjsfWbZLA)

 

Palin and Women’s Issues

She has spoken out against legislation for pay equity for women, parroting John McCain’s views.

 

She is radically pro-life, and is against abortions EVEN IN THE CASE OF RAPE, OR INCEST.  She has said: “I’m pro-life… The legislature should do all it can to protect human life. (Source: Q&A with Newsmax.com’s Mike Coppock Aug 29, 2008)

Palin wants to ban sex education from schools and teach an abstinence-only curriculum. Clearly that strategy worked well for her daughter, Bristol.   And yet, Governor Palin recently cut funding for a program to assist unwed teen mothers.  It’s a shame, because Bristol could use that program right now.  Finally, Palin wants no public funding for programs that would talk about sex, STD’s, abortion, or any similar issues relevant to young women and their rapidly maturing lives. 

 

Let’s think:    Palin doesn’t want girls educated on issues related to sex, pregnancy or STD’s.  So, they fumble around in the dark (figuratively speaking) about these things, but if they get into trouble they won’t have any assistance to get help when they need it…

 

Come on, ladies!   You might relate to Sarah Palin.  You may even see yourself in her.  I do.  She and I have a great deal in common, as a matter of fact.  We both grew up in small towns, and played a mean game of basketball. We got similar degrees in broadcasting.  We’re both moms.  Of course, I don’t hunt, kill, and butcher the bacon.  It’s enough for me to just cook it in the pan. 

 

Let’s look past that book jacket.  Use the kind of tenacity and focus you’ve used to choose the best schools, programs and activities for your kids, and investigate who Sarah Palin is and what she stands for. Don’t just be enamored with the idea that a woman is #2 on the ticket.

 

Examine John McCain’s reasoning for putting Palin on the ticket in the first place – to placate the neo-conservative, fundamentalist base of the Republican Party. You and I may come out on opposite ends after “reading the book” on Palin, but at least you’ll know what you’re getting.

 

I AM A SOCCER MOM AND I WEAR MY OWN COLOR LIPSTICK.    I urge all moms to take a moment between drop-offs, pick-ups, and play-dates to read up.  Speak out.  Gossip with each other for goodness sake.  Exchange the information you have with each other to get the entire picture!

 

Then go out in November and vote….for Obama.

 

A Soccer Mom in middle-America

 

 

 Want to know more about Sarah Palin? Check out some sites – there’s lots of info out there.  I won’t list the obvious media elite, because I don’t want to be tagged as elitist or snobby, or God forbid, overly intelligent.

 

http://www.ontheissues.org/Sarah_Palin.htm

http://www.2decide.com/table.htm

http://uspolitics.america.gov/uspolitics/elections/issues.html

 

 

 

 

 

September 11, 2008

An open letter to John McCain

Filed under: politics — Tags: , , , , — tigresden @ 1:23 pm

September 10, 2008

 

 

 

Dear Senator McCain:

 

When Senator Clinton didn’t get the Democratic nomination, I was undecided about my vote in November.  I’ve followed your career and have admired your toughness and willingness to stand on principles, not party lines.  So, I watched the Republican convention to listen to your message. I was encouraged by your statements that you “weren’t working for a party, or a special interest,” that you were working for Americans.  However, I wasn’t sure if you had a clear view of my America.  So, as an independent-thinking, suburban, soccer-mom who identifies more with a labradoodle than a pit-bull, I’d thought I’d sketch you a portrait of my American family.

 

We’re raising two young children who attend public school. We are nondenominational Christians. We are economic conservatives who want less taxes and smaller government. We are also a neo-traditional, legally married, two-mommy family. My spouse, the consummate working mom, works seven days a week at her office, and shares equal responsibilities at home. I’m a member of the PTA. I volunteer at my children’s school and am an active participant in their extracurricular activities.

 

We are true centrists: economically conservative social liberals. Political Party aside, I thought you could relate to the issues important to my family – economy, energy, security and education.  We’re concerned about saving money for college and retirement. We worry about raising our kids while caring for our aging parents. We’re concerned about escalating healthcare costs – that one illness could put our family in financial jeopardy, as it did to my own brother just recently. We’re concerned about climate change and want energy policies and solutions that will provide power WITHOUT sacrificing our planet’s well-being or our children’s future. We want our country to lead the world towards global peace not global war. The next President must be the most skillful commander-in-chief this country has ever seen to rectify the terrible mistakes of the last eight years.  Finally, in the richest, most powerful country in the world, we must do better than “No Child Left Behind,” which sets standards for academic excellence but does nothing to help schools achieve them. 

 

Your campaign evolved from “EXPERIENCE COUNTS” to “CHANGE IS COMING”, and I eagerly anticipated the announcement of your running-mate to see if he (or she) would reflect the kind of change you were hoping to make in Washington.  You presented Governor Sarah Palin.

 

You say she is a groundbreaking reformer, a change agent with small town roots who relates to women and families – a new face and a new voice for a new administration.

 

Her choice is certainly groundbreaking and I can relate to her life experience. We’re about the same age and grew up in small towns. We are both moms.  Of course, she can shoot a gun and dress a moose.  I shoot hoops and the only animal I dress is my dog on Halloween. 

 

But a voice for change??  I read her bio on your website and many articles from respected sources.  I learned that she’s voted against women’s rights and hate crimes.  She’s hired lobbyists to gain earmarks for her small town while claming she is against them.  She’s lied about her stand against the “Bridge to Nowhere.”

 

In talking about Iraq, she has said “Our national leaders are sending them (our soldiers) out on a task that is from God…” and that “there is a plan, and that it is God’s plan…”  If another kind of fundamentalist was speaking these words, we’d be calling her a terrorist. In a world riddled with fundamentalist vitriol and fanatical attacks, the President needs someone at his side who won’t let faith cloud reason, but have faith that reason will prevail.   

 

My family’s values are as traditional as they come.  We believe in family, faith, country, integrity and respect for hard work.  We believe that if you have passion for what you do and give your best effort, you will find success.  These values come from our parents.  I’m the daughter of immigrants who arrived in America in the early 60’s.  My father-in-law came home from Korea with shrapnel in his body, and went to law school on the G.I. Bill.

 

However, we’re also part of an America that looks a lot like Joseph’s Technicolor Dreamcoat: 35 million African-Americans; 35 million Hispanics; 13 million Asian/Pacific Islanders and Native Americans; and 6 million people of a multi-racial heritage and counting…*

 

It’s an America with an increasingly complex and disparate economic landscape that reaches from the highest mountains of wealth to the deepest valleys of poverty and an ever-shrinking plain of the middle-class.

 

It’s an America whose social structures are as intricate as a patchwork quilt: strips, and swatches of traditional families, blended families, and adoptive families. Single moms, single dads, grandparents raising grandchildren. Families with two moms or two dads, and multi-ethnic families with hapa, mestizo, and afro-cabo-latino-amer-asian children of all shades, shapes, and hair textures.  Americans all – stitched together by the thread of a common dream – a better world and a brighter future.

 

For all your talk of CHANGE, your choice of Governor Palin champions the same narrow-minded, polarizing message the Republican Party has been feeding Americans for the last thirty years.   

 

For those of us who were seriously undecided, you were the viable Republican alternative.  I once thought, “If a Republican is going to be in the White House, at least it’s John McCain.” 

 

Not now. 

 

Perhaps I’ve been wrong about you all these years. Perhaps your aspiration to be President overwhelmed your need to be true to yourself. Whatever the reason, you have sacrificed your own record and identity to win this election. This is not the John McCain I’ve admired. 

 

I wish you had chosen differently. It would have made my decision much more difficult, but I would have felt better that change was coming to Washington from both sides of the aisle.  It’s a shame that it’s not.

 

 

Sincerely yours,

A mom from middle-America

 

(*based on Census Bureau Report of 2000).

May 21, 2008

So you wanna get a license?

Filed under: GLBT Community, marriage — Tags: , , , , , — tigresden @ 9:23 am

So, now that the Supremes have sung their refrain on gay marriage, now what??? During the next 30 days before the ruling is active, all the county registrars will be hustling to create new forms, train up their staff, and get ready for the onslaught of same-sex couples.  In the meantime, Chief Justice George, a Republican (let me say that again!) a Republican!!! will be taking the heat from all the far-right sides about this momentous decision.  He has been quoted that this was one of the toughest rulings he’s ever had to make in his career. (Read the article.)  

I’m a pragmatist.  The only thing I want to know is “How do I actually get our license and fast!?”  I wish it were as easy as going down to city hall, it’s actually a Los Angeles County thing, so a couple has to go to an assigned county registrar office to obtain a marriage license. For those of us in the greater Los Angeles County area, our choices are: Beverly Hills, Van Nuys, Lancaster, Compton, East LA, and Norwalk. Sucks for us living in San Gabriel. Let’s see, shall we cross the Valley or brave the 5 or the 405 freeway in daytime traffic????? Hmmmm…maybe I’ll just stick pins in my eyeballs.

Nevertheless, sitting in freeway traffic to get our marriage license will be well worth it.

So, here are just some things to know about getting a license in Los Angeles County.  For more detailed information go to the LA County registrar’s office website at  http://www.lavote.net/clerk/marriages.cfm

1. Both spouses must be present to sign the application.
2. Both spouses must provide PROOF of IDENTITY by way of driver’s license, passport, or alien ID card. And all documents must be in English.
3. You DON’T need a blood test or a health certificate to get a license in CA.
4. You DON’t need to be a citizen of the US or a resident of CA to obtain a marriage license in CA.
5. The license fee is $70 payable by cash, check or money order.
Oh yeah, licenses can be obtained if you show up at the office at least 1 hour before the registrar’s office closes.  So no last minute quickies, boys and girls. 

 

But getting a marriage license isn’t everything….Weddings and licenses are all the talk right now.  The wedding business are going to have a mini-gold rush with all the gay weddings that are going to happen between now and November.  For those of you who haven’t been together for a million years waiting for this miracle to happen, for those young ‘uns who will be true newlyweds, I’d like to share this with you, courtesy of that great swami, Oprah.  She recently featured the 20 questions one should ask BEFORE tying the proverbial knot.

I wouldn’t stake my relationship on this questionnaire, but it does make a good conversation starter, yeah?   If you really want to get down and dirty and find out about who or what type of person would be best matched to you, I’d sit down for the hour that it takes to fill out the personality profile at eharmony.com.   It’s free, and even though eharmony doesn’t match for gay couples, it’s uncannily accurate in developing your profile and spitting out the profile of the person with whom you would be most compatible. (But that’s another whole blog entry, which I’ll get to later.)

Question 1: What percentage of our income are we prepared to spend to purchase and maintain our home on a monthly or annual basis?

Question 2: Who is responsible for keeping our house and yard cared for and organized? Are we different in our needs for cleanliness and organization?

Question 3: How much money do we earn together? Now? In one year? In five years? Ten? Who is responsible for which portion? Now? In one year? Five? Ten?

Question 4: What is our ultimate financial goal regarding annual income, and when do we anticipate achieving it? By what means and through what efforts?

Question 5: What are our categories of expense (rent, clothing, insurance, travel)? How much do we spend monthly, annually, in each category? How much do we want to be able to spend?

Question 6: How much time will each of us spend at work, and during what hours? Do we begin work early? Will we prefer to work into the evening?

Question 7: If one of us doesn’t want to work, under what circumstances, if any, would that be okay?

Question 8: How ambitious are you? Are we comfortable with the other’s level of ambition?

Question 9: Am I comfortable giving and receiving love sexually? In sex, does my partner feel my love for him or her?

Question 10: Are we satisfied with the frequency of our lovemaking? How do we cope when our desire levels are unmatched? A little? A lot? For a night? A week? A month? A year? More?

Question 11: Do we eat meals together? Which ones? Who is responsible for the food shopping? Who prepares the meals? Who cleans up afterward?

Question 12: Is each of us happy with the other’s approach to health? Does one have habits or tendencies that concern the other (e.g., smoking, excessive dieting, poor diet)?

Question 13: What place does the other’s family play in our family life? How often do we visit or socialize together? If we have out-of-town relatives, will we ask them to visit us for extended periods? How often?

Question 14: If we have children, what kind of relationship do we hope our parents will have with their grandchildren? How much time will they spend together?

Question 15: Will we have children? If so, when? How many? How important is having children to each of us?

Question 16: How will having a child change the way we live now? Will we want to take time off from work, or work a reduced schedule? For how long? Will we need to rethink who is responsible for housekeeping?

Question 17: Are we satisfied with the quality and quantity of friends we currently have? Would we like to be more involved socially? Are we overwhelmed socially and need to cut back on such commitments?

Question 18: What are my partner’s needs for cultivating or maintaining friendships outside our relationship? Is it easy for me to support those needs, or do they bother me in any way?

Question 19: Do we share a religion? Do we belong to a church, synagogue, mosque or temple? More than one? If not, would our relationship benefit from such an affiliation?

Question 20: Does one of us have an individual spiritual practice? Is the practice and the time devoted to it acceptable to the other? Does each partner understand and respect the other’s choices?

So good luck folks.   Book the location, the caterer, and the officiate of your choice because it’s going to be a really busy summer.   Look up the rules and regs in the county of your choice and get that license.  

 

May 15, 2008

Supreme Court ruling on marriage

Filed under: Family, GLBT Community, marriage — Tags: , , , , , — tigresden @ 1:22 pm

 

The CA Supreme court has ruled today IN FAVOR of marriage – for ALL couples.  Not just boy-girl couples, but boy-boy and girl-girl couples.  That means, that for those of us who have made commitments to our partners, who are raising our children, and building our extended family and community, we can be recognized LEGALLY as family unit.  

 

 

 Our wedding day

 

When Pamela and I had our commitment ceremony nearly 13 years ago, we did it knowing that we would not have the same rights as a hetorosexual couple.  We couldn’t appropriately say, “We’re getting married.”  We had a “commitment ceremony” officiated by our minister, Reverend Larry Keene.  We were wed in the eyes of our Creator and our family, but not in the eyes of civil authority.   We had to take extra measures to ensure that our rights to take care of our spouse and our children were recognized by civil institutions, like hospitals, and schools, and workplace.  When I gave birth to our first child we went through the ridiculous exercise of adoption through the Department of Child and Family Services (DCFS) whereby I had to sign away my parental right to my daughter so Pam could adopt her as a single parent…but, nod-nod, wink-wink, there’s a statement at the veeeeery end of that legal document that says, “I’m really not giving up my rights, but since you, the state, don’t recognize our freedom to be a family, I have to go through all these hoops, so our daughter can have two – count them – TWO MOTHERS!  Thankfully, by the time our second child was born, that nonsense was replaced with a more civilized procedure.  When Henry was born, Pam, as my “Registered Domestic Partner” (“RDP”) was even on the birth certificate as the “Father”.  Talk about miracles.

 

Many things have improved over the last 13 years, and California has the most comprehensive Domestic Partnership Legislation in the entire country.  But as we have learned in this country, “separate but equal” is neither fair nor equal.  Back in the 1940’s the California Supreme Court lead the country by being the first state to recognize and  legalize inter-racial marriage, and they used that historical context to study and reflect upon the issues they faced in this case.   

 

So, what does that mean for us, “Al Franken?”  What this means in practical terms is this:  When a schoolmate asks, “Are girls allowed to marry girls?”  or “Is your mommy married?”, my daughter can answer unequivocally, “YES.”  There is no more quotation around the term “married”.  There is no more caveat, “Well, we had a symbolic ceremony, but it’s not legal.”  (Odd enough since it is the right wing, fundamentalist conservatives who are leading the fight against legalizing same-sex marriage.)

 

 After 13 years, two children, and a dog, Pam and I can line up at City Hall and apply for a license.  We can obtain a piece of embossed paper that will put us on equal footing with all the other legally suffering married couples in California. And to that, I say, YIPPEEEEEE!!!   

 

 

Excerpt from Supreme Court opinon…

 

…. our state now recognizes that an individual’s capacity to establish a loving and long-term committed relationship with another person and responsibly to care for and raise children does not depend upon the individual’s sexual orientation, and, more generally, that an individual’s sexual orientation — like a person’s race or gender — does not constitute a legitimate basis upon which to deny or withhold legal rights.  We therefore conclude that in view of the substance and significance of the fundamental constitutional right to form a family relationship, the California Constitution properly must be interpreted to guarantee this basic civil right to all Californians, whether gay or heterosexual, and to same-sex couples as well as to opposite-sex couples.[1

 

 For more information, or if you’re a legal geek and want to see the opinion, go to http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/

Comprehensive news coverage from:

CNN.com – http://www.cnn.com/2008/US/05/15/same.sex.marriage/index.html?eref=rss_topstories

The Mercury News   – http://www.mercurynews.com/breakingnews/ci_9269719

Los Angeles Times – http://www.latimes.com/news/local/la-me-gaymarriage16-2008may16,0,6182317.story

San Francisco Chronicle –  http://www.latimes.com/news/local/la-me-conflict13-2008may13,0,7029593.story

 

 

 

 

 

 

May 1, 2008

On the subject of marriage

Filed under: Faith, Family, GLBT Community — Tags: , , — tigresden @ 12:27 am

This year will mark 13 years of “marriage” for my partner and me. I put the quotes in there because, technically, in the eyes of the state of California and all the others, except for my beloved Massachusetts, we are less than married. At least in California, our commitment is recognized by the Domestic Partnership Bill. As such, my partner is recognized as the legal parent of both of our children. I am covered under her insurance policy, and we can, should we choose to, file our taxes jointly. Regardless, we still have gone through extreme measures to plan and strategize our estate planning, and health care directives because you just never know. Should we ever move out of the enlightened state of California, our choices for a new home location will be limited. Mind you, I like the choices – New York, Massachusetts, New Jersey, and Oregon are fine states. However, the fact remains, that in the land of the free – my family is restricted as to where we can live safely and securely, with the assurance that our family unit will be recognized and respected by the social services, hospitals, and government offices. As my son’s teachers say, “Boys and girls, that’s unacceptable.”

And so, in this election year we need to make sure that whoever we bring to office locally, state, or federal office – will be someone who will support the Freedom to Marry for All people, not just some people.

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